137+ Dark Puns That Will Have You Laughing in the Dark

Dark humor isn’t for everyone, but if you enjoy a bit of twisted wit, these dark puns are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.

Whether you’re a fan of macabre jokes or just like to get a chuckle from the darker side of comedy, these puns will brighten your day (or at least make you laugh nervously). So, dim the lights, grab your favorite snack, and prepare for seriously dark humor!

1. Grim Reaper Humor

• “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.”
• “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.”
• “The Grim Reaper said he couldn’t come to my party. He had a prior engagement.”
• “I’d tell you a death joke, but it’s to die for.”

2. Twisted Wordplay

• “I didn’t want to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop, but when I got home all the signs were there.”
• “I’m friends with all electricians. We have such good current connections.”
• “I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m OK but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.”
• “Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.”

3. Dead Funny

• “I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.”
• “I told my friend 10 jokes to make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did.”
• “I tried to start a pun business, but it didn’t work out. I guess I’m not pun-derful enough.”
• “My friend said he wanted to be cremated. I told him, ‘You’ll be ashes of your former self.'”

4. Dark Jokes About Life and Death

• “They say that money talks, but mine just says goodbye.”
• “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough, so I quit. Now I’m just kneading the dough.”
• “I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.”
• “I’m writing a book on reverse psychology. Don’t buy it.”

5. Morbidly Funny

• “I’m learning to juggle. It’s just a matter of handling things one day at a time.”
• “I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.”
• “I have a great joke about construction, but I’m still working on it.”
• “I have a fear of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.”

6. Ghoulish Fun

• “The secret to a good pun? It’s all about timing, and timing is everything… especially when you’re dead.”
• “I was reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.”
• “My math teacher called me average. How mean!”
• “My skeleton didn’t want to go to the party. He had no body to go with.”

7. Creepy and Clever

• “I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.”
• “I broke up with my last girlfriend because she was a grave digger. She just wanted to bury our relationship.”
• “The only thing that’s more terrifying than clowns is the clown who knows all your secrets.”
• “I don’t have a favorite horror movie. I just like them all dead equally.”

8. Spooky Puns

• “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.”
• “I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke.”
• “I asked the librarian if the library had any books on suicide. She said, ‘They’re on the shelf over there, but they’re just on loan.’”
• “I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.”

9. Morbid Humor

• “I’ve started investing in stocks: beef, chicken, and vegetable. One day I’ll be a bouillonaire.”
• “I don’t trust the stairs. They’re always up to something.”
• “I tried to be a doctor, but I wasn’t cut out for it. I just couldn’t stomach it.”
• “If we shouldn’t eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?”

10. Creepy & Deadly Jokes

• “I’ve been reading a lot of books about anti-gravity. I can’t seem to put them down.”
• “I recently found out I’m allergic to broccoli. When I get near it, I turn up dead.”
• “I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.”
• “Don’t ever trust the stairs. They’re always up to something.”

11. Twisted Humor

• “I’m a huge fan of whiteboards. They’re re-markable.”
• “I’d tell you a joke about an elevator, but it’s an uplifting experience.”
• “The only exercise I get is running out of ideas for jokes.”
• “A blind man walked into a bar… and a chair… and a table.”

12. Grimly Funny

• “I bought a belt the other day. It’s a waist of money.”
• “I couldn’t figure out how to make a pencil disappear. Then it dawned on me.”
• “If I were a cat, I’d be nine lives ahead of you.”
• “What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line.”

13. Funny and Dark Wordplay

• “I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.”
• “I once met a man who told me his whole life was a joke. I laughed, but he didn’t get the punchline.”
• “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.”
• “I decided to become a magician. My first trick was making my job disappear.”

14. Horror Movie Humor

• “I met a girl who was into dark humor. I thought I’d make her laugh, but I guess I was a little too dead on arrival.”
• “Why don’t skeletons ever fight each other? They don’t have the guts.”
• “My therapist says I have a fear of commitment. I told him, ‘Let’s talk about it next week.'”
• “I’m trying to come up with a joke about ghosts, but it’s just not haunting me.”

15. Wicked Puns

• “I have a fear of gravestones. It’s just a plot I can’t seem to shake.”
• “I don’t play hide and seek with my shadow anymore. It always finds me… but then I lose it.”
• “Why don’t graveyards have 4G coverage? They’re full of dead zones.”
• “I was once asked by a ghost what my favorite fruit was. I said, ‘A boo-nana!'”

16. Macabre Laughs

• “I tried to organize a hide-and-seek contest, but it’s hard to find good players. They’re always hiding.”
• “My uncle’s a doctor. He’s great at healing, but he’s terrible at giving up bad habits.”
• “I was going to tell a dead-body joke, but I figured it might fall flat.”
• “I like my jokes like I like my coffee—dark and bitter.”

17. Mournful Humor

• “I had a great joke about a skeleton, but I forgot the punchline. It was a bone of contention.”
• “I wanted to be cremated, but my family decided on an open-casket. It really put a damper on the situation.”
• “They say laughter is the best medicine, but I think it’s just an excuse to get people to laugh at your funeral.”
• “I have a terrible fear of dying. But I try not to think about it too much—otherwise, it’s just too grave a topic.”

18. Eerie Wordplay

• “My mom always told me to be careful what I say, especially at the cemetery. I guess she was just trying to bury the hatchet.”
• “I once had a nightmare I was a zombie. I was really dead on my feet.”
• “I opened a coffin and realized it was just a skeleton key. Now I feel like I’ve lost all my keys to life.”
• “I’m writing a book on necromancy, but it’s dead on arrival.”

19. Graveyard Giggles

• “I don’t want to say my life is in a rut, but I think it’s been buried under the ground for a while.”
• “I wanted to buy a Halloween costume, but everything was too overpriced. I ended up going as a broke ghost.”
• “I was hoping to get some great fortune cookies, but they just told me I’d be digging myself into a hole.”
• “I never understood why people take photos at cemeteries. I guess they’re trying to capture the dead moments.”

20. Chilling Fun

• “I heard a joke about a ghost, but it was just too spooky to repeat.”
• “My friend told me I should go on a diet, but I can’t imagine life without carbs. It would be a grave mistake.”
• “I hate it when I find a pun that’s ‘dead on arrival,’ but at least I can always count on a ‘resurrection’ joke.”
• “I heard they were making a horror movie about a haunted bookshop. It’s sure to be spine-tingling!”

21. Spine-Chilling Puns

• “I told my wife I was going to the graveyard to pay my respects, but I think I’ll just give it a rest.”
• “I used to be afraid of ghosts, but now I’m just afraid of them haunting me with bad puns.”
• “I tried to find a joke about grave digging, but they were all buried in bad taste.”
• “I accidentally made a mistake while doing my funeral plans. It was a bit of a ‘slip of the tongue.’”

22. Sinister Humor

• “My friend said he didn’t like dark humor. I told him that’s okay; not everyone can take the heat in the afterlife.”
• “I used to have a job at a cemetery, but I got tired of all the dead-end situations.”
• “The ghost of Christmas past came by to see me. It was a haunting experience.”
• “I was once asked if I believed in the afterlife. I said, ‘I’ll get back to you… after I’m dead.’”

23. Deadpan Comedy

• “I once asked a skeleton to go out with me, but she said she was already taken.”
• “I would tell you a dead-body joke, but I’m afraid it might not land well.”
• “I was going to tell a grave joke, but I thought it might be digging too deep.”
• “I tried to tell a zombie joke, but it was just brainless.”

24. Creepy Jokes

• “I have a pun about ghosts, but it’s a little too ‘boo-ring’ to share.”
• “I told my friend I was going to buy him a headstone for his birthday, but he said it was a little too ‘engraving.’”
• “I’m trying to come up with a joke about vampires, but I think it might suck.”
• “I’ve been asked to do a pun about death, but I’m just worried it’s a topic that might backfire.”

25. Deadly Humor

• “My friend said he wanted to become a grave digger. I told him it was a real ‘dig’ into his career.”
• “I heard there’s a haunted house down the street. I’m too scared to visit, but I might try to ‘ghost’ my way in.”
• “I decided to become a mortician, but it’s really hard to ‘bury’ my past mistakes.”
• “I tried to write a joke about a haunted mansion, but it just wasn’t ‘ghost’ material.”

26. Dark Puns Than Ever

• “My friend said his life was on the ‘up and up,’ but I reminded him that we’re all just ‘down to earth’ eventually.”
• “I once thought about becoming a coroner. But it didn’t work out. I guess it’s not the kind of job that has ‘resurrection’ opportunities.”
• “I used to work at a funeral home, but the pay was low. I guess it’s just ‘dead-end’ work.”
• “I tried to make a joke about death, but it was ‘dead in the water.’”